I drew up a shortlist of five trilogies which I thought would be in contention for the top. Many great ones did not make the cut as I was being incredibly strict on my decisions. For example (and it may come as a shock to several people) a trilogy is made up of precisely 3 films. Not 4 (sorry Indiana, Ripley and McClane) and certainly not 6 (sorry Yoda). I know many people will cry that Star Wars is 2 separate trilogies and that the fourth Indiana Jones should not be counted for being what is technically known as shite but they were all made by the same people and therefore are part of the same franchise. Controversially though I would have accepted The original 3 Spiderman films as they have rebooted the franchise and started from scratch much like Nolan's Batman did. The Bourne films are out due to the upcoming fourth instalment (same universe and characters even without Matt Damon). I did allow The Toy Story trilogy because a) Although everyone suspects and half knows they will do a fourth one it is not official and hasn't even started shooting yet. And b) my girlfriend likes them.
To make the cut the films needed to continue a storyline running through them (so no Clerks, or vengeance trilogy) and have three consistently good movies. So many trilogies are let down by terrible last instalments including the original Xmen trilogy, The Godfather trilogy, Spiderman, Blade and The Matrix. I was worried I was going to be left with only Back to the Future, Toy Story and the Rush Hour films and there was no way Chris Tucker was coming in third so I did a bit more research online. Many other series of films were just too different from each other to be classed as a 'proper' trilogy. Silence of the Lambs, Hannibal and Red Dragon are all films starring Anthony Hopkins as Dr Lecter but just too different in tone to be put together (and 'Hannibal' is pretty bad apart from when the guy from Goodfellas eats his own brain). I also really wanted to put the Millennium trilogy in the top 5 (The Girl with the...books and films) but something tells me if they get Danny Craig to make the other two then the American remakes might actually end up being better. Others that didn't make the cut were The Evil Dead and The Mariachi (the ones with Antonio Banderas and a guitar case full of guns) trilogies because the sequels are essentially remakes of the originals but made on more than a $50 budget.
And so we come to the top 5. Not the top 5 best movies (many of the ones I have previously mentioned are miles better than some of the ones I am about to. I will give my reasons why they are included before my crack team of whoever answered my phone calls and wasn't busy this evening thrash it out over lager, Twiglets and Haribo. Please don't complain because Star Wars or Indy isn't in there. Blame George Lucas, not me. So in no particular order:
1) The Austin Powers Trilogy
I can already hear people screaming at their laptops/phones/IPads. In fact I am going to probably be the only one defending this particular set of films. But with the exception of Ron Burgundy I challenge anyone to think of a funnier film character than Dr Evil in the past 20 years. Deserves to be on the list purely for having made 3 comedy movies and still be funny (The Hangover didn't even make it to 2 remember) and also to remind us that Mike Myers used to actually be amusing. Do yourself a favour and watch them again; They're better than you'll remember.
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| Would someone please give this guy his own Spinoff? |
2)The Dollars Trilogy
Now I am not a fan of Westerns. However for the sake of this article I will be settling down tonight to watch 'The Good, The Bad and The Ugly,' 'A Fist Full Of Dollars' and 'the other one'. Purely because I am assured that for fans of the genre it is the best trilogy ever made (Bet you anything it comes fifth).
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| It's the guy from Million Dollar Baby!! |
3) The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy
Christ when was the last time anyone sat down to watch all of these back to back? The 'new Star Wars' gets included even with the forthcoming Hobbit because they are based on different books (and yes if Star Wars was based on a book then maybe that would have sneaked in here too; but it isn't so hush your gums.) Considered by most to be the most epic of epics it is truly a wonder of modern film-making and wonderful story telling. But is it still amazing all these years later? Does it suffer with Return of the Kings 6 million endings. Are the hobbits really just a bit shit? And is Legolas still cool when most people now know Orlando Bloom as that twat from Pirates of the Caribbean?
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| No matter what it's still a great excuse for a Sean Bean picture |
4) The Back To The Future Trilogy
Great Scott! Without any films with the words Wars, Terminator or Bourne in the title this is probably my trilogy of choice. it does everything a trilogy should. Not leaving too much time between sequels. Constantly upping the stakes. And having the final part set in the Wild West for no particular reason. Michael J Fox is a perfect leading man (playing 4 different members of his own family over 3 movies.) No matter what you think about the sequels there is no denying that everything is wrapped up nicely in what is actually only 3 days in the movie (apart from the 130 year time span). It is just good clean family fun.
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| The Scalextric set had gone fucking mental |
5) The Toy Story Trilogy
Do you know why Toy Story gets in here? It's not because my lady friend demanded it. No, it's because it has more heart and warmth and gives us more life lessons than any of the above movies (by above I of course mean above Back to the Future which taught us about how to make sure your parents have sex.) Possibly the best ensemble cast ever put to film it became the animated movie not just for my childhood in 1995 but with DVDs and the threequel released 2 years ago it became the childhood movie for a generation nearly 20 years younger than me. And
(spoilers)
anyone who didn't cry when they are heading into the furnace at the end of the third one simply doesn't have a heart. Now coming from a kids film THAT'S impressive.
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| The singular reason why no child in 1995 has ever thrown any of their old toys away |
So there you have it Batman fans. They're the films Nolan has to beat on Friday. To be fair they will probably be called better than the Austin Powers movies anyway and I've given him a fair old chance by not including Star Wars or Indiana Jones. Read the next part of our trilogy debate tomorrow as we count down towards the film of the years release. And don't complain because I've missed out your favourites. Firstly; you don't pay me so I don't really care and secondly; I think I've given pretty good reason why I have anyway. Damn it I forgot about Men in Black!
Peace & Love
This article is dedicated to all the good first films and sequels let down by a terrible third instalment including (but not limited to) Indiana Jones. The first 2 Matrix films. The first 2 Alien movies. X Men 1 & 2. Terminator 1 & 2 (although I actually quite liked the others). The original Batman, Batman Returns and Jim Carrey in Batman Forever. Blade 1 & 2. The Godfather 1 & 2 and Andy Garcia in part 3. The first 3 Die Hards. Spiderman 1 & 2. And above all Pirates of the Caribbean whose great first effort was let down a total of 3 times by complicated sequels and Orlando Bloom. May you all be released on blu-ray and dvd singularly from now on. Amen.
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